the last week in a nutshell, not so hot

It's been a while since my last blog entry, but I've had absolutely nothing good to talk about... So I figured why even say anything at all.

I forgot how crazy the swings in poker can be and how they really put you to the test. In the last week, I've had to question myself alot about poker, life, and where do I see myself going with all of this.

Believe me, I'd loving nothing more than to be able to play poker professionaly and live the simple life... But I am really beginning to understand what the pro's are saying when they say "it's a hard way to make an easy living".

The original plan was to have at least have about 5k put away aside from my bankroll so I could move out of home and out to the mainland with enough cussion to last me a few months while I get my feet on the ground and find a good part time job. That and have a poker bankroll of at least 7k to keep a steady income from poker.

Right now, I have about $1,400 - $1,500 saved up, and about $2,500 in my bankroll. I have got a lot of work to do if I plan to move out any time soon. Not to mention, I still have over 1k left on my dell credit card for my new laptop, car payments, cell payments, small kine rent, gas money... uggghhhhh. I don't even want to think about it anymore

Ok, some poker talk now. The last week was hectic, I don't think i've booked a winning session this whole week, at best, maybe once or twice, I got to break even. All of this has sent my bankroll from $5200 to a mere $2500.

I haven't cashed in a MTT in a while, though I have played a bunch of them and thought I played really well too. Only problem is I can't catch a hand when I need it most to send me deep. I go on rushes at all the wrong times, and card dead at the most crucial times. That, and I can't win a coinflip to save my life. But this is all just temporary, i know, It'll turn around soon enough.

For cash games, I have played nothing but 2/4 limit. Trying to grind it out the hard way... the disciplined way. And again, I've had a rough start, averagin a bb/100 of -.28 over 3,000 hands. But I know there are still a lot of leaks in my game that I need to patch up before I can become a better more consistent winning SSHE player. Going to hit the books hard and post in the strat forums so maybe I can identify and fix them as quickly as possible.

Right now, i think my biggest leak is having to call down and have a showdown to prove that the villian has sucked out on me. Costing me lots and lots of valuable bets in the long run. thats going to be the first leak that I fix.

Side notes: Tried out 6 tabling for the 1st time today and think I could get used to it It really keeps your mind busy and thinking all the time. it gets me out of trouble a lot of the time too when faced with a questionable decision, I'll usually just tend to fold and stay out of trouble.

Now if I could only figure out a way so that the donkeys couldn't suck out on me anymore...